The Threshold: Finding your way through Change and Transition Coaching

There is a specific kind of silence that arrives when a chapter of our life closes. Whether it’s the quiet of an empty nest, the jarring shift of a career pivot, or the internal hormonal riot of peri-menopause, we find ourselves standing at a threshold.

In these moments, our instinct is often to rush through the door. We want the new job title, the resolved relationship, or the "new normal" immediately. But there is a sacredness in the waiting. In nature, the caterpillar doesn't just sprout wings; it dissolves completely in the dark of the chrysalis.

Navigating these transitions isn't about "fixing" a problem. It’s about learning to sit at the edge of yourself and listening to what is trying to be born.

The Four Chambers of the Threshold in Change and Transition Coaching

In transition coaching, we can look at transitions through this framework. It’s a compass for when the terrain feels unrecognisable:

1. The Shedding (The Ending): Acknowledging what is dying. This is the grief work. We cannot carry everything into the next room so how do we let go and compost what is no longer needed?

2. The Fertile Void (The Middle): The space of "not knowing." This is where we practice staying present even when it’s uncomfortable. Mindfulness can support us in the liminal space.

3. The Quickening (The Spark): Noticing the small, quiet impulses of desire or curiosity that start to flicker in the dark. We need to be open, conscious and alert to pick up the seeds of possibility in the collective unconscious whether it is in a dream, contemplation or reflection.

4. The Integration (The Return): Stepping across the threshold with a new shape, bringing the lessons of the dark back into the light. Using our head, heart and gut to embody the change.

A Practice for the Woods (or Your Garden)

If you are feeling stuck in the "in-between," try this Threshold Walk. It’s a way to let the land hold the questions your mind can’t yet answer.

• Find a Boundary: Locate a physical threshold—a gate, a fallen log, or a change in the path where the woods meet a clearing.

• The Inquiry: Before you cross, ask yourself: "What am I leaving behind on this side of the line?" Breathe into the weight of it.

• The Crossing: Walk across slowly. Notice the physical sensation of moving from one space to another.

• The Arrival: On the other side, stand still. Don’t look for answers. Instead, look for a "symbol"—a stone, a bud, a specific shadow—that represents the quality of energy you need right now (e.g., resilience, softness, or stillness).

• Reflect: What does this symbol tell you about your inner landscape that your "thinking mind" missed?

"The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek." — We often think the transition is the obstacle, but the transition is actually the path itself.

When we stop fighting the change and start collaborating with it, we realise that peri-menopause, career shifts, and evolving roles aren't just "phases." They are initiations. You aren't losing yourself; you are being refined. For more on transition coaching visit here.